Online Poker Etiquette

Nice F*@^ing Hand

Nice F*@^ing Hand

Why oh why do I have to respond to ‘nh’ or even ‘gg’ every time I win a hand or a game? Does it make any difference and what is the point? The only time I have felt the need to type ‘nice hand’ or ‘good game’ was when I was being sarcastic and it was either typing those unhelpful and deceitful letters or smashing the computer.

But some players online seem to make a habit of writing those letters all the time. Its as if they need the company or they are trying to hard to be nice and poker is not about being nice it is about taking money of someone.

Its got to the stage where I completely ignore the sad ingratiates. I ignore them because I cant be bothered to respond constantly to inane messages, the people who make a habit of typing these words are dullards and sad bastards and I do not want to be associated with them, and, you will be associated with them if you respond to the message!

The message I do like are the ones that attack you for being lucky or making poor play. These make me laugh and will sometimes illicit a response from yours truly, but, on the whole I will have a nice chuckle to myself because my play had created a bad reaction in my opponent which is good.

‘Wp’ or ‘well played’ is another loser phrase I hate to see. it is always written by a leaving guy who was totally ignored but cant accept that no one wanted to communicate and now that he/she has gone, we will get on with the game of financial liberation warfare.

I once typed ‘wp’ when I went all in from an early position with a pair of 5’s, knowing full well that I would be called. I then did it again from early position with AA’s and got called again that will teach them to respond to messages – happy days.

Another reason why I am loathed to write messages is that the messages always come out wrong or illiterate and actually takes time to write. Maybe I am overly lazy, but, the idea of messaging the other players about absolute nothing, is a complete waste of time. so there you have it. If a player ignores your ‘gg’ or ‘nh’ and constanttly plays irrationally and badly then it is yours truly so don’t get upset.

The other thing that winds me up is people typing  ‘zzzzzzzzzzzzz’ when I decide to really slow play. Typing in ‘zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’ will not make me play any faster, in fact it will guarantee that I will play even more slowly. Sometimes I will go out of my way to play exceptionally slowly as it makes the other players think that I am some sort of bot and this scares the life out of my opponents.

So to end this diatribe on people trying to make silly online conversation while playing poker, please do not write stupid messages as a lack of response may cause offence. If you have to write a message please be as rude as you can be because the online poker firms will not boot you off as it means a loss of revenue, and, that does not make sense since there is a recession don’t you know.