The Joy Of Pub Poker

The Cotton Tree Droylsdon

The Cotton Tree Droylsdon

Why settle for a swanky casino, getting your drinks brought to you, having the staff refer to you as ‘Sir’, and, most of all surrounded by clean atmosphere and clean toilets, when you can partake in a night walking the wild side with f&ckwits who have been committing incest and robbing old ladies?ante

Yes my friends welcome to the world of pub poker. In the world of pub poker there will be an expert on the game of poker because he once went to a casino in Las Vegas after winning a trip to said US city. In pub poker you can be asked to purchase a raffle ticket to win a load of meat or box’s of chocolate which may or may not have been stolen earlier.

In pub poker there will be an idiot who want to play the juke box because he is ‘bored’! Not only play the juke box but play it at full volume as it somehow enhances the atmosphere!

While playing pub poker you can observe local drug dealers in their natural habitat. Selling watered down stuff to young whipper snappers at a rate that would make an electric company CEO proud in how a semi-illiterate retard can over charge and the customer is grateful? Oh yeah drug dealing is popular in pubs and some landlords get a kick back from the sale. Nice!

The continuing pleasure of pub poker includes drinking beer from pipes that have not been cleaned for ages. Sometimes they will have ‘bits’ floating in the beer giving the drinker much ‘valued’ protein intake that they would not necessarily have because of the players nocturnal lifestyle. 

All in all pub poker is a much lauded activity and with the added benefit of carnal knowledge with the ‘local bike’ being on offer to the biggest winner on the night up for grabs. You would be a fool for not wanting to take part.

Yo! Locus vestri ante, confundo una quod servo