Just a quick note about the Poker Tottys and what they are upto:

Toni Sharpe and Brooke-Elise Sharpe

The big news is that the first Poker Totty Toni Sharpe gave birth to a baby girl – Brooke-Elise Sharpe and is doing great.

In the future Poker Totty Toni will be involved in the modelling business but with Toni its all about the family first so do not expect a massive amount of photo shoots.

The one project she maybe involved in is still under discussion but it is the project yours truly has been working on for the last few months. so do not be surprised to see the Original Poker Totty in a new guise.

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Christmas is the pulling season in my book. Stuff all the guff about born in a manger as it never happened. If Jesus was born it was probably in September and not December. The only reason it is in December is that the Romans used to have a festival in December which allowed the Christians the ability to celebrate in December or whatever the month was called then.

Also Christmas is a rip off, a conspiracy to make adults spend loads of money on ungrateful youngsters in the vain hope of getting some peace and quiet in the next year. I have a simple equation for this it is called the PK Equation for Xmas – the older you get, the less presents you get, but, the more presents you have to buy.

The only good thing about the festive season is that there are loads of sex to be had and all it requires is a few simple words, some drink and some moves and away you go. Just been reading a piece of work by a scientist with the appropriate name of Dr Lovatt who studies dancing and how it can get you laid. All you really need to know is that learning the moves from Saturday Night Fever and stop listening to The Arctic Monkeys will get you in bed with more ladeeeessss. Here is to The Pulling Season and stuff the turkey.

Werewolf or a woman with PMT

A new report from The Medical Journal of Australia confirm my view that full moons mean trouble. In the article they did some research that showed that violence increased and the nature of violence changed when there is a full moon.

This is not new the Roman word for moon is Luna and it is also where the word lunatic comes from ie mad behavior is caused by the moon. Womens pre-menstural tension is also related to the moon which can be a source of grief as many men can tell you.

Landlords of pubs will tell you that the time to get grief is when there is a full moon. Doormen also testify to this and so will gamblers.

Time and time again weird and wonderful behavior accure when playing poker, betting on sporting events. As a rule avoid tempremental animals and dont drink when there is a full moon should be the unwritten law for all gamblers.

Why am I writing this today well in my pursuit to get more money on Rage Against The Machine and being thwarted, I rejected 3 major winning bets. Accrington Stanley to beat Notts County (9/2, 5.5), Joe beating Olly for X Factor (7/4, 2.75) and Ryan Giggs becoming BBC Sportsman of The Year (7/2, 4.5) and I blame the moon, not my stupidity.

This stupidity ‘insight’ led me to play some serious online poker and guess what I lost seriously. Can I blame it on the full moon – you betcha!

Right now it is the time to make plans for the coming year. Deep down you just know the majority of plans will end in dust, especially those that rely on the personal will such as stop smoking/drinking/betting/over eating etc. But as they say you can never under-estimate the human spirit.

Without these aims and ambitions what is there to live for? What would be the point in saying ‘’I will continue to do exactly the same as I did last year’’? Exactly, so you know you will probably fail, you know you will probably eat more/drink more/smoke more and lose more but without the ability to make mistake we would not be human we would be angels and I have been around a bit and I am yet to meet an angel.

So when your next on a table with a ‘all in fish merchant’ and you know the minute you get pocket ace’s and he goes all in with KJ unsuited – and he win, at least you can say ‘’I wont be drinking/eating/smoking/betting for a month’’ and mean it….

Happy New Year everyone and may all your flops be the nuts, and, you never get splashed by the river!